handcuffs
Stressing Out
Ok, well I'm not one to "be" emo or anything but everyone has to vent, right? Ok, so here it goes... this guy I totally fell for 8 months ago decided that him and I should just be firends... for real this time. We went out in October for 4 weeks, broke up, two months later I told him how I felt, we had a thing going on for a little over a month, then we broke that off because he felt bad about something he did, then two months later we discussed some things online and fixed our problems, so we met up, things happened, now a month or 4 weeks or whatever after, he's decided we should just be friends again... not even friends in life, like we don't get to hang out together at all. I guess it's a good idea but it is honestly torture. Everytime we see each other in life or talk on MSN we alwasy end up deciding to hang out or do things together... for some reason we try to just be friends but it never works... I mean we can have a friendship and go out but not just be friends. It's very odd. We have the most interestiung conversations about all sorts of things, history, religion, video games, literature, etc. I don't really understand why we cannot just be friends without doing anything though. I guess we could keep doing this but the problem is that he doesn;t really want a gf, or maybe it's that he is finally realizing that we cannot keep this up forever. It's rather painful for me but I want him so much... and his logicalness, grr.... I know ogicalness is not a word but it's the only word to describe him besides saying "anti-social gamer". Even handcuffs were involved... Err, forget I said that, you do not need to know. It gets worse though, I'm doing alright and I know I will eventually get over it but in the meantime I ahve 3 guys that like me... it's weird, I'm not used to guys liking me or having feelings for me so this is causing me to freak out and break down. I am confused alot now because I don't have feelings for any of them. It doesn't help any to know that I found out this the day after the guy I went out wth said we should just be friends... only trough email. Hey, at least he thinks that oneday him and I will be able to be friends without him trying to get into my shirt or pants... he thinks of me as a good friend too which is actually very rare... seeing as he actually only hangs out with 6 or so people and they are all guys.
